The Depression Diaries

I have been sucked into the madness that is being a dog owner. I confess I used to be a complete cynic when I saw people doting on their dogs on the street, rolling my mind’s eye and looking down upon the masses of brainwashed people who treated their dog as their child. “Wake up, people!” I would think. “Stop sublimating your need for love and approval into your feelings for your dog!”. Of course, all that cynicism came back and peed defiantly on my carpet in the form of an adorable 4 year old beagle.

I can feel myself turning into one of THEM. First, there was the time I bought her the automatic kong dispenser for while I was away at work. Then, came the sweater, which I swore I would never buy (that she needs because winters here are bitterly cold), because I throw up a little in my mouth every time I see a dog dressed like a baby. The last straw was when I actually bought a dvd for the dog. Let me reiterate — a dvd, for MY DOG. I had been reading stuff online and felt guilty that she had no mental stimulus while I wasn’t there, so I got one of those crazy “While you’re away” dvd’s for her (which by the way, she completely ignored). Finally, I reached the lowest of lows yesterday when I referred to the little bean as Tai’s cousin.

It’s been about six months since I got Tai, and she has been awesome so far. Next frontier to reach crazy dog mom status: a dog stroller* and weekly trips to the salon to get our nails painted together. Ooh, a business idea: doggie bjorns. Hello, early retirement!

* To clarify, I think this is a terrible idea for healthy dogs.